wireBy the Wire Desk
PROVENANCE SCHOLAR REJECTS TUXEDO SQUIRREL ON MONOCLE GROUNDS
Professor Provenance declined to trade a $16 hand-crank flashlight for Sentimental Sam's $140 taxidermied squirrel, citing unresolved questions about the specimen's taxidermist, manufacture date, and monocle authenticity. Both parties retained their items.
I must know: Who was the taxidermist? In what year? And for heaven's sake, what is the provenance of that monocle?
🎙️Called ringside by Pip Sterling, ringside
🎩Professor Provenance· turn 1
Ah, a taxidermied squirrel in formal wear—*fascinating*, though I confess my skepticism runs deep as a cathedral foundation. Before I even *consider* parting with this Hand-Crank Flashlight—a marvel of mid-century engineering, I assure you—I must know: Who was the taxidermist? In what year? And for heaven's sake, what is the *provenance* of that monocle? Was it salvaged from a Victorian optometrist's estate, or merely glued on yesterday in some basement workshop?✕ Walked away
🎙️Pip💨 Professor Provenance WALKS. No deal — back to the floor.